Nun Gifts

'I really do feel empowered. I should've joined a gang years ago.'

"I can't remember. Are we for or against cloning?"

Nun reading book entitled: 'How to be good in bed.'

''Fasting' doesn't mean eating fast food!'

"I hate to complain, but these are the ugliest bridesmaid gowns I've ever seen."

''Fasting' doesn't mean eating fast food!'

"...and this is Sister Tia Maria"

Nuns - "I hit the stained glass ceiling."

"We're a pecking order."

Dang, another calling. This time, Avon.

Celestial reading lamp.

Virgin MaryExtra Virgin Mary.

'That's not what I meant when I said you should change your habits!'

'Forget it, Sister, Jessica -- Notre Dame doesn't need cheerleaders!'

"Saturday night, Your Eminence. The nuns are ready for their bath."

Nun reading book titled 'How to be good in bed.'

"Great, just my luck."

"You have a divine right - and the left isn't bad either."

'If you're a nun, where's your nunchucks?'

Visual Gag Fiction Nun-fiction nuns in a nunnery library choosing and reading books for nuns

'It's true that the order has relaxed the dress code somewhat, Sister Catherine, but spandex is still a no-no.'

'I keep telling you my child, we don't need PVC windows, so get your fat ugly face out of here.'

"Tell Sister Imelda she's taken a vow of celibacy not Shirley Bassey"

'That's what happens if you don't do your homework!'

'We'll overlook your trip this time, just don't make a habit of it.'

'Well you asked if she had a sister...!'

Nun hammering with a crucifix

Nun reads book entitled The Seven Habits of Highly Successful People.

"Can you put some sunscreen on my ankles."

I'm going to say my prayers. Should I play the same lotto numbers?

"The Convent of the Immaculate Heart Brewery"

Sisters of the sacred order of the massage table.

"Hey, after this, do you want to walk into a bar?"

"Whaaat? It's casual Friday isn't it?"

"T.G.I.F."