Nude Aficionado Gifts

Disgusted of Northants

I used to love coming here. Nudist beach.

In the art gallery

"Beats me why but my girlfriend says I have a one-track mind."

'I have one last question: this beach is clothing optional, right?'

Sex Section in the Library

'Oh I'm keeping abreast of it.'

The only way I can get through a nudist convention.

'I wouldn't have brought the cat if I'd know he had to be naked too.'

'Muriel had a traumatic experience at a topless beach -- she was sunbathing, and a toddler attacked her.'

Sometimes, the more adventurous of the flock would hit the beach and play nude volleyball.

'No luggage.'

" Actually, Dear, I said I wanted to start eating 'all natural, not 'au naturel'!"

'Before I agree to marry you, I want to see what you look like with clothes on!'

Portrait of an admiral spying on the nude portrait next to his.

"Fred, no one is going to bother you here. Put away the Bare Spray."

"Let's go in here. Word has it that his cave drawings are nothing but nudes."

'Hold everything! -- The National Endowment for the Arts changed its mind!'

'And that one painted and forgot to close the curtains.'

"I think what I like most is they haven't got any clothes on."

Naked cleaner in a nude exhibition.

Naked Man and His Trusty Sidekick Black Bar Boy.

"What are we doing? I think the real question is, what are you trying to hide?"

'You pluck one more feather and I'm going to stay with mother.'

'What are they, men or women? I don't know, they're not wearing clothes.'

'Did you know your fly was open?'

'Remember...No hexing and driving!'

'Naturism is not a religion, Perkins, nor can this rightly be termed 'dress'.'

'Why can't you collect stamps like everybody else'

'Do Not Feed The Bares'

'Not in front of the neighbours, Dear!'

Crystal ball tells fortune teller: 'He's screwed.'

Naked cleaner in a nude exhibition.

'From what you've told me, Lord Godiva, I think your wife is having a mid-life crisis.'

'You're supposed to draw something.'