Novice Practitioner Gifts

'G-g-golly! One day out of med school and I'm about to perform brain surgery! Just look at that scalpel shake!'

"First time pruning?"

Math 101, for those who can only count to 100.

Today we learned to count to one.

Please buzz off. That's my flower!

'Don't you know that less packaging creates more waist?'

Yoga for beginners,

"I'm surprised, Caswell. I thought you were a happy camper."

Yoga Beginners Class. Breathe and stretch. That's Good. URGH! OOOF! "Yoga pants" should be something you wear and not something that happens because you can't catch your breath!

"This is my first book, but if I like it I may buy another in the near future."

"I packed the cooking gear like you told me, Dad...where do I plug it in?"

"Triple whammy."

Look, dork, I won't ask again. Will you help me use a computer? Maybe. What for? Internet Scrabble. I hear it is possible to play – what is the word? Online? I should like to send data over cyberspace. Through cyberspace.

'Alex we talked about this, you can't bring live things home from the lake. . . no buts, they don't want to leave the lake. Let your little friends go.'

"Not lengthways you idiot!!"

"Oh, man, I forgot to stretch, ever."

"Cupcakes for the judge? You're new here, aren't you?"

'I'd join Twitter, but I'm worried I'll make a hash of it.'

Happy House Daycare. Family-owned & family-run since this many years.

The not-so-living wall

"People are always saying how stupid it is that the bst practitioners are always promoted and make poor managers....but I think that's complete rubbish...He was a lousy practitioner as well!"

BOOKSHOP, 'We're pushing our do-it-yourself kit today, sir -- a ream of paper and a dozen pencils.'

'You may well, Ms. Ferris, one day write a 'Fifty Shades of Grey' bonkbuster, but today your account is one shade of red.'

Freshman Ryan Brenneman was having a tough time acclimating to life away from home.

I really hope the agent likes my submission... - '' - 'This is perfect.' - '' - 'Absolutley perfect.'

Gardening for Beginners

"I've discovered I don't have a head for figures."

"Of course he's not our son. You wanted me to change the baby, didn't you?"

'Let's face it,Edgar.you and mother nature don't have anything in common.'

Napkin Writer

'Tom just had his first workout at the gym.'

'Your first lesson is free.'

If I learn how to write Roman Numerals, will that help me write computer code?

"Yes! I got one over! Woo-hoo!"

"Your lessons on crypto and NFT's. . . priceless!"