Novelty Finder T-Shirts

'Oh wow! They're got brown pottery, stained glass sun catchers and cows cut out of plywood!'

"We found the poor thing stranded on the beach last summer and decided to adopt it."

"Don't worry about your purchase not working. Everything we sell here is totally non-functional."

Dog Walking Services

King Henry and his Cheshire bride

"I warned you not to use that club...now look, you struck oil!"

Raincloud Umbrella

Turd - 'It's one of a kind.'

Not to be a motion picture. Will remain just a book.

'What clan do you belong to?'

'I'm so bored - nothing ever happens around here!'

Crap from the future.

'You're a genius, Hoppy!'

Advocado

Cloning Dept. Ooh! She's got your eyes and nose, mouth...

'Half-baked beans, low fat variety' "Who says we have no taste?"

Clyde in his 'egg-beater.'

Hay Rides $10

A man is trying to play golf with a football boot attached to a stick.

Useless add-ons.

Cash Machines From Across the Land

'Sorry, Frank, I know this is your favourite lake, but I just can't eat fish who smoke cigarettes.'

"So, do you want balls that only go up, or ones that only go down?"

"This new phone app for opening the beer is great, Bruce!"

'No, I didn't know it was hunting season - why do you ask?'

An experimentalist alarms his guests by describing the appearance of the mushrooms in a dish they have just eaten.

'Tell your mom you coughed it up and you're guaranteed a day off from school.'

Bathroom Fairy

Electronics: Nooks/Crannies

"Well - I've either bought a pack of table napkins, or adopted a Siberian tiger cub..."

Mohammad's motors

'The New... New, Swiss Army Knife.'