Nonsense Appreciator Gifts

Secateurs and non-secateurs

Alice in Wonderland - Farmer William

Greeting Card Shop: No Rhyme or Reason Cards.

Ego Publishing: 'I'm sorry, but 'Slither A Mile In My Shoes' doesn't make any sense...'

'Keep me informed of the herds' mood.'

(oil - petroleum - gushing out of inkwell)

"Who's got the hammer?"

"Well, what did you expect? They were both missing vital organs."

Turd - 'It's one of a kind.'

As you like it - 'Waiter, chicken with watercress please' 'I'm sorry sir we haven't any chicken left ... but if you wish I bring you a larger portion of watercress...'

'This guy loves giving stump speeches. Ironically, they're all against deforestation.'

'The boss said I never made any profits and I never found customers worth mentioning and that's why he promoted me to the company's chief bad example!'

"We didn't want to know the gender in advance."

"Whoa. Jeff. Looks like you got that job at the cosmetic testing lab."

'Oh great. Our luggage has been sent to Alpha Centauri.'

"I have to refill it everyday. He has a tendency to retain water."

"Steamed vegetables."

Don Quixote is Caged (Don Quixote).

Giant ape juggling planes and captive.

Through the Looking Glass - Queen Alice with Frog

'Oh Hi!'

Barcode Dreams

'This one is for serving 27 years in the military without anyone finding out I'm gay.'

'...And now, the film most criticized for eroding traditional family values, the nominees are...'

"Exactly how undecided would you say you were at this precise moment?"

"She's a show dog...purebred, of course." "That's great! My guy's a Sanskrit scholar...wrote for the Harvard Lampoon."

The deadly sport of cobra staring contests.

'It's cutting edge theatre.'

Russia Money Laundering

"Good news. It's a small pig."

"Amateurs."

"How long were you in the waiting room?"