Noisy Sleeper Pillows

"He hums in his sleep."

'This one's good if you like to toss and turn all night.'

"I'm afraid the price would make him toss and turn all night for months!"

"I have to say, sleeping in a coffin is way better since I got the box spring."

'Sure I sleep all day. She snores all night.'

Sleeping masks

"Not me, brother - you wake him!"

'Since we got this round bed, I've been waking up dizzy every morning!'

For goodness sake, can't you see I'm on a night shift!

"Honey, you awake? Are you sleeping? Well, I hated your lasagna tonight."

A caveman sleeps with a club labelled 'Snooze' whilst a beaten looking rooster stands by.

“I get that the sounds help you sleep, but I don’t like the way he stares.”

Man using light to shield his eyes.

"Tonight the covers stay on my side."

"This alarm clock is guaranteed to wake you. It's sounds like a husband snoring."

Waking the Dead.

"Just two paragraphs from our internet provider's terms and conditions agreement and she was out like a light."

'No, I heard you snoring -- you just dreamed that you attained Nirvana.'

"Sorry - is my snoring driving you nuts?"

Cat wakes up owner demanding to be fed.

"This new adjustable mattress really does stop your snoring!"

'Honey, honey. You've got to stop walking and talking in your sleep!'

"Dad, can you stop snoring?"

'Get up or I'll send in gramma.'

The Home Birth of Venus

"Could you stop making that breathing sound?"

"I used to be taller. I tend to grind when I sleep."

"Wake up Jeff. You're snoring again!"

'I'm going to get up, do the treadmill, walk the dog and leave for work early. What are going to do?'

Cat Dreams

Counting sheep.

"It says, 'sorry ... I forgot you're three hours earlier out there'."