Noise-sensitive Reader Gifts

silence please

"Sorry, the sound of your chewing sends me into a rage."

A man is living in small box apartment trying to read a book, but is surrounded by people engaging in noisy activities.

Sensitivity Reader's Digest

'You were a band geek?! Maybe Max will play an instrument!'

"You need to turn down the vibration setting on your cell phone."

Music for car stereos

Car with enormous speakers, "I said, I love the speakers!"

"It's always so loud during yappy hour."

'Normally, I enjoy a morning when the birds are singing.'

Sensitivity Reader

'Quiet with your crisps please, I can't hear the film.'

"I was going to go to the other slop trough, but the music's always too loud."

Man completely bandaged leaves an eye uncovered so he can read.

"Jordan takes his wife's wind chimes – he shoots!"

"What the?! They're installing a wind-chime in our tree! I can't stand the things: we have to move!"

'Peace is at hand! - I just signed the Bagpipe Limitation Treaty!'

You are what you collect.

Blower wars.

Has Your Cat Always Had Such a Loud Purr...?

I'm here for my training course. - 'Please take a seat' - 'Ah... ten blissful minutes to read the paper in silence.' - '' - 'Did you park in the red bay?' - 'Yes.' - 'Big mistake, 'half pint'. You can't park there.' - 'But...' - 'Move it!!!' - 'Okay, ok

"Have you decided what household object you're hiding under this July 4th?"

An advertisement in an apartment window reads 'Drum Kit For Sale' - the sign in the neighbours window reads 'Thank God!'.

"God...I hate elevator music."

'Sure, it's nice of the farmer to leave us to graze freely in the mountains, but this darn bell is driving me crazy...'

Ear Plugs for Aliens.

"I look forward to coming here for great tasting coffee. Every morning. . . but you are talking so loud I can't even smell it!"

Egg farm for sale: 'All that clucking and cackling is driving the owner nuts!'

"You know that summer's arrived when you can hear four different radio stations from your own lawn."

Open Top Car Stereo volume control, 'irritate', 'annoy', 'enrage'

'Why don't you use a leaf blower? It annoys the hell out of people.'

The musical notes coming from a tuba knock down a man carrying a briefcase.

'Selma never had a lesson in her life. She picked up all that noise on her own.'

"If we're going to continue ignoring each other, we'll need a lot more reading material."

"Don't feel bad Rex: desperate measures for desperate times! That new trumpet of Young Master had to disappear..."