Noise-sensitive Person Gifts

"Jordan takes his wife's wind chimes – he shoots!"

'I'm going to drag my sled up and down the sidewalk until the noise drives nature crazy and it snows.'

Fish that snore, and the tragic lives of those who care.

Future garbage truck driver.

"Sorry, the sound of your chewing sends me into a rage."

"I'll stop when I'm good and ready to."

'You were a band geek?! Maybe Max will play an instrument!'

'You haven't heard anything yet!'

'Don't forget to take your tranquilizers Daddy, little Jimmy is coming round to play.'

"You need to turn down the vibration setting on your cell phone."

Music for car stereos

"I've had a sore throat ever since we moved near the airport!"

Wake the eff up with the official New York City alarm clock. Choose your distress signal: car horns, sirens, barking, heat pipes, mouse feet. Guaranteed to disturb!

'The cannon will go off every 20 minutes just to make sure you're paying attention,'

"Threatening to call the Noise Abatement Society isn't being very romantic, Sydney."

Leaf-Blowers: Loudly making yardwork someone else's problem since the 1960s.

Car with enormous speakers, "I said, I love the speakers!"

"It's always so loud during yappy hour."

Library Grand Opening

A question you can't ask at a football game - 'Has anyone lost their keys?'

"Now that's what I call a sound system."

Playing dustbins

"Vuuuuuuuuuuu!"

Ambulance Paramedic making the 'Nee Naw' noise.

Confucius say: shut up.

Communication

"Mmm... now WHERE did i leave my radio..?"

'Normally, I enjoy a morning when the birds are singing.'

"Here's the deal. I'll stop playing my bagpipes when you stop playing your banjo."

"Sorry for the racket, but, I ask you, how are ya gonna keep 'em down on the farm after they've seen 6-B?"

Lawn Mowers - Loud/Louder/Loudest

"You don't like my new whistle?"

"Hello dear- couldn't you sleep either?"

'Quiet with your crisps please, I can't hear the film.'

'I play it to kill time.'