Nightly News Fan Gifts

"Spoiler alert. There is no good news tonight."

'We interrupt this programme for a sex flash.'

"I love it when you use your 'All Things Considered' voice."

"Mom, please! I'm a married woman whose friends have been reviewed favourably by the New York Times."

"I'm Lester Holt, and this, is date night."

It's great for pulling the birds!

'Mixed day on Wall Street. Economic indicators were up, but executive bonuses were down.'

'Are we watching business news or sports news?'

Nervous World Markets.

NSA - 'Start Leakin'.'

If you don't give me a free hot chocolate, you're probably not a patriot. #$%* Fox News.

Lights Action Camera Justice

Political Debate, 'I'd like a word with the debate chairman.'

Fiscal cliff

"A man threatens to destroy town with army of turtles after dispute with city hall. Local authorities initiate a shell-ter in place in preparation for the noc-turtle invasion."

"My real money comes from my TV news appearances predicting stock market rises and falls."

"In financial news, Greek shares continue their slide. Of note, International Feta Cheese continues to crumble."

A fake news reader amongst a series of real newscasts.

Pop star weather report.

"We interrupt C.B.S.'s evening news with a special bulletin from N.B.C.!"

'You're beat. Maybe you need to wake up to a better morning news team.'

The Old Curiosity Shop

"President Gorbachev had his hands full again today."

'That was the worst performance I've ever seen.'

'Police have counted the dead resulting from today's disaster. However, they suspect that some of these victims may be just playing possum.'

"They're dumbing down the news now!"

"It took me a long time to teach him how to fetch a newspaper."

"He passed out from apoplectic rage directed at Trump's voter fraud conspiracies."

Mole News: Obituaries

Up-to-the-minute reporting from our man on the street.

The Panic Forecast

New to podcasts? Choose a genre!

Stable Genius

"I've called this media conference to say...We have nothing to say!"

Matt Gaetz's Impeachment Stall Tactics