Light News Fan Gifts

"On the lighter side, here's Muffin with a piece of string."

"And just like that, e got rid of Florida."

News: Deaths! Deaths! Deaths!

'Let's go to our education reporter for more underreporting of school success stories.'

UK border controls relaxed.

"I can't decide what I fear the most, Putin's Russia or Putin's America."

'Greek debt was downgraded for the 11th time this week, by S&P, to P.O.S. Negative Infinity, meaning it's safer to eat uranium, than own Greek debt.'

Meet the Enemy

Apart from protest footage I forget what downtown looks like.

News Internecine: Murdoch succession battle

'We interrupt this programme for a sex flash.'

"This just in: one of us always tells lies; the other always tells the truth. Who's who? Stay tuned."

Weatherman: "Tonight's weather forecast is confusing, followed tomorrow by downright bewildering."

"Er...nothing much has happened yet today...."

Trump Destroying U.S. the Postal Service

Reporter #6: television.

Capital Tours

Idlib, Syria - The final stage

"Hang in there everyone—we promise a cute animal story at the end."

"My goodness, if I'd known how badly you wanted democracy I'd have given it to you ages ago."

Big Newspaper Delivery

Classic News.

'Mixed day on Wall Street. Economic indicators were up, but executive bonuses were down.'

'Bad news on Wall Street. The entire stock market has been downgraded to a 'junk' classification.'

Charades

As you can see, media coverage at this event is very heavy...

'You've been killing files again.'

'Are we watching business news or sports news?'

'According to the latest poll, 64% of the public don't pay any attention to polls...'

'And in local news: Someone is hiding behind the drapes.'

"It makes me happy that you took time to read the newspaper today."

"You can't believe everything the Russian bots tell you."

CONGRESS, 'It was a really tight race this time -- I had to use some of my campaign contributions for CAMPAIGNING!'