Newsprint Enthusiast Gifts

'Ah, you must be the paper boy!'

The eighty-five year old half-blind man that always ran the paper shop had taken his first day off in thirty-five years'

'That large, rolled up newspaper is a reminder - mess up in this office and you'll pay the price.'

"Why don't you ever fetch anything good like a pizza?"

STRIP Hambone: Paper work

"First they came for the horoscope and the crossword and I did nothing. Then they came for the cartoonists and there was no-one left to satirise it."

"I'd like to see you do this online."

'Is this your first book launch?'

"Just as I thought! You used our competitor's paper for your resume!"

Big Newspaper Delivery

'OK, who moved the photocopier?'

'My teacher said my penmanship has really improved since I started doing my homework on an inkjet printer.'

"Just when I think things couldn’t get any worse, they replace The Lockhorns with Doonesbury!"

'Ah, Gutenberg, I'm just writing an article about your silly bookpress.'

'We can't afford advertising like this! That's one page for the drug and two just for the side effects!'

Johannes Gutenberg

"These printers can be pretty self-righteous when they present their bills."

Sunday.

'Read ALL about IT! In other less TRASHIER Newspapers!'

'Yes we do have health benefits, but read the fine print. You're only allowed to get sick once every three years.'

Publishing Clauses Of The '90s.

'Our definition of a 'bargain' is right there in the small print.'

'you just don't get the idea of being a watchdog, do you?'

'Your polar ice cap is melting.'

Woman Feeds Her Husband Through the Morning Paper.

'Normally I don't like a newspaper because of its pictures.'

Execution of the Editorial Cartoon

'Grandpa isn't very child-friendly, is he?'

'I'll show you my fine print, if you show me yours.'

"According to the Times, the cartoonist drew my right hand wrong."

power of press

'Talk about paranoid. He reads the fine print on his money.'

"Rapunzel? Rapunzel moved out years ago. I'm Bruce, and I have a stack of old newspaper clippings I'd like to show you."