New Pencil Collector Gifts

Back to School.

"No Timmy, I don't think your pencil has system requirments or upgrades you can download from the internet."

(oil - petroleum - gushing out of inkwell)

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

'It's genuine 17th century satsuma - and the pair would have been worth ?14,000.'

"Sorry sir - the self-propelling pencils have all just walked out..."

"Did you bring any protection with you?"

'Heirloom Tiffany Lamp Delivery. I Brake for Everything.'

Bingo night.

Stationers' sign leaking ink onto a passer-by.

His cubicle had come to be known as 'Teddy Bear Heaven'.

Hamlet in the craft shop.

'... Going once...going twice...aaaand--sold! To the gentleman in the front row for a thousand words.'

"My dad says this pencil was once used by William Shakespeare." "Is it 2B or not 2B?"

'...So you claim this is genuine Rembrandt?'

"I need a special pencil for math...one with a lot less wood and a lot more eraser."

Office: Empowerment Drawer.

Cello player with pencil instead of bow

"Twenty-five thousand, do I hear thirty thousand? Let me remind you all - this is the last Thin Mint cookie in the sleeve..."

"I've run out of invisible ink..."

The Appearance of the Gatling Machine-Gun in 1864 caught the world by surprise.

"Fetch, Ernie, fetch!"

'It's Jones Sir! He's showing of his ball point pen again!'

"I wonder what this was for."

"Now now, what have I told you about using your zombie knife at the dinner table..."

Empty landscape containing food and stationery.

"The only think we'll be able to shoot at soon will be that right to roam lot..."

Pencil sharpeners in hell

'Yes, the wood on this pencil is from a renewable source.'

Indian snake charmer charms a snake.

"I'm sorry, I can't assist with this request."