New Mom In The Making Gifts

Maternity Hospital

"I see that he is growing as fast as your law firm."

'I've had some baby sized clubs made.'

'Don't worry. It's never too hot or never too cold.'

'You call it a bra. I call it excess packaging.'

"You mustn't pull the cat's tail so hard it tugs the head inside, sweetie!"

"No wonder babies are born screaming. I haven't had a wink of sleep since the exit light came on!"

"That's all I get? A sonogram? No tracking number?"

'and remember delivery is free if it happens in a half hour!'

"It's so nice to finally put a face to the name."

Same Day Delivery: "I wish!"

Mother Nature

'A Caesarian? - But I want my son to be a natural-born citizen!'

Fitness Programme for babies

'We found you in a cabbage!'

Mary, remember that you're pregnant and are now eating for 2,000.

"You know what they say, there's one born every minute!"

"What is it? You're not wet or hungry. Mommy's not a mind reader. OK, I am, but I've never been very good at it."

'It's the same model... he painted the second one eight months after the first painting.'

'The dripping keeps me awake!'

"Travelling with Child Sketchbook - day 2."

'Cracked nipple? But I didn't even drop you.'

"I want to have at least two children - I have too much guilt to give for just one."

"With the baby-cam, there is no privacy."

'Don't worry about gaining weight after the baby - you'll run it off during the toddler years.'

"Underwater Childbirth Ward."

Woman as a beacon and guide of the family

'Ugh Not Again!'

'You're due in September, however, since you're not mentally ready, let's make it October!'

Kids really do make you view the world from a different perspective...I'm on the floor, behind the couch, under the bed...

Why all mothers deserve a special day.

In the club.

Breastfeeding: Good Design Council

'Have a heart, officer... the little mite is starving!'

"The test results show that your baby is healthy, and that she already wants the new iPhone."