Becoming A New Mother Gifts

'I was well-informed, well-adjusted, a useful member of society - then I married.'

Woman as a beacon and guide of the family

'Excuse me Madam!!'

'Ahhh . . . he's got your original nose.'

"Don't worry, your "Mama Bear Instinct" will kick in once you have your first baby..."

Maternity tattoos

"I see that he is growing as fast as your law firm."

'I've had some baby sized clubs made.'

'Don't worry. It's never too hot or never too cold.'

'You call it a bra. I call it excess packaging.'

"You mustn't pull the cat's tail so hard it tugs the head inside, sweetie!"

'What's play?'

'I'm keeping a scrap book. All I've got so far is one umbilical cord.'

Doris K. Elston: Brain Surgeon, Professional Model, Artist, Lawyer....Plus Mother of Four.

'Change is inevitable, espeically when you have a newborn in diapers."

Mother Nature

"It's so nice to finally put a face to the name."

Don't worry, I see babies, lots of babies...

Mr. & Mrs. Stickfigure are expecting twins.

Old Lady in shoe driving a footie (sock) car.

'Well, he definitely has his father's... Er... Eyes.'

"I hoped you'd change your hobby when you became a father"

'Your wife has given birth to the blues.'

Fitness Programme for babies

"...for a canal I thought that was unusually short."

'We found you in a cabbage!'

"You know what they say, there's one born every minute!"

"What is it? You're not wet or hungry. Mommy's not a mind reader. OK, I am, but I've never been very good at it."

"Do you want to talk about it?"

'The dripping keeps me awake!'

'Will I have to be a mum when I grow up?'

"Travelling with Child Sketchbook - day 2."

'Cracked nipple? But I didn't even drop you.'

The Elephant in the Womb

"We sing her to sleep with songs about recycling."