Becoming New Parents Gifts

'Of course I know what he wants when he cries. He wants you.'

"We want one that's genetically gifted but not genetically spoiled."

Parents sleeping with a new baby.

"Remember- we want her to stand out and fit in."

'Well, he definitely has his father's... Er... Eyes.'

"Aw, his first mobile..."

Sue, Ted, The Twins.

Impractical Guide to Having Babies: What's that stuff by the light switch?

"Oh Oh... I Think I'm Stuck!"

'Your wife has given birth to the blues.'

'Change is inevitable, espeically when you have a newborn in diapers."

'Oh hi honey, did you get the baby mobile for over the crib?'

"You can over-encourage kids, you know."

'...may your union be blessed with children...and for those of us who believe in ATTACHMENT PARENTING, could they please do so now!'

'I can't help feeling we've forgotten something.'

'A little to the left dear. The one with your eyes and my nose...'

Parents for dummies.

'Suddenly my special Valentine's day delivery to her doesn't seem like the most special delivery today...'

'Said once, and never again!'

'Sorry folks. All these jokes can't be winners.'

'No creamed peas for me today!'

New heroes!

Look at it this way: You're changing the future of the nation...one diaper at a time!

'I'm keeping a scrap book. All I've got so far is one umbilical cord.'

Amateurs...

"Or, it could be a huge advantage."

Now, dear, he's not bad, he's just overtired.

Ugh

"I suppose one day he'll have to become a teenager, won't he?"

"We sing her to sleep with songs about recycling."

"Support the head."

City Zoo: Day Care

"Can I borrow the car keys?"

"Are you insane?!" The Velveteen Skunk

Domestic Superheroes!!