New Fitness Journey Gifts

'But I think shopping three times a week is more than enough exercise!'

Santa struggles to play sports.

Tired executive going into gym coming out gleaming

"Keep goin', Harry. No pain, no gain!"

Lady drying hair whilst on exercise bike.

On the back of the t-shirt...

'What distance! Pity it wasn't the hammer!'

"Your bad cholesterol is trying to persuade your good cholesterol to switch sides."

"If we carry them home we’ll get at least one workout."

'If you exercise you add 10 years to your life.' - 'But I would spend the 10 years exercising.'

'You need to stay away from the pie in the sky.'

'What'll it cost me to got in shape for yardwork season?'

Exercise now!

It's okay -- I'm training for the 2020 Olympics.

Exercise Bars

'Swimming is the healthiest sport. . . Because it's the only one where you can't smoke while you're doing it.'

Guy in gym

Man to woman leaving health club: 'The instructor said I had lots of body definition ... plump, rotund, obese, heavy ...'

Jogging...

'The doctor said you need more exercise, so I've hidden the remote control.'

Gym. It doesn't help when you call the ab workout a "journey to the center of the girth."

Gym. You lost a pound this week? It's only because I always leave here too tired to go looking for it!

"You need to do less talking the talk and more walking the walk."

"I told him not to rely on his GPS whe out running!"

"I'm starting slowly with a trainer who just stands around talking about his personal life."

"When I suggested you should walk a couple of miles a day I didn't mean to just see me!"

Man on beach realizes laying down flattens his stomach

'I think dad's getting fitter. I couldn't hear him wheezing until he turned the corner today.'

'I tried running once, but I kept spilling my drink.'

'My cellulite is getting stronger.'

"Bear in mind there are three laws in this gym we cannot ignore: health, safety and gravity."

"Our new treadmill is easy to use, you just set it to the speed setting that's most comfortable for you."

'she's been at that three weeks now and it hasn't moved an inch.'

"Why settle for itsy-bitsy when you could be swole as hell?"

'I'm downsizing in hopes of a merger.'