Fitness Journey Start Gifts

'I'm looking to lose just enough weight so that I no longer get that inner thigh swooshing sound when I walk.'

Lady drying hair whilst on exercise bike.

On the back of the t-shirt...

Be Healthy

'What distance! Pity it wasn't the hammer!'

"If we carry them home we’ll get at least one workout."

'Eat less. Drink less. Be merry more.'

'You need to stay away from the pie in the sky.'

'If you exercise you add 10 years to your life.' - 'But I would spend the 10 years exercising.'

Exercise now!

'What'll it cost me to got in shape for yardwork season?'

'Swimming is the healthiest sport. . . Because it's the only one where you can't smoke while you're doing it.'

Tired executive going into gym coming out gleaming

Exercise Bars

"You need to lose 20 cable channels."

'The doctor said you need more exercise, so I've hidden the remote control.'

Man on beach realizes laying down flattens his stomach

Jogging...

Man to woman leaving health club: 'The instructor said I had lots of body definition ... plump, rotund, obese, heavy ...'

Gym. It doesn't help when you call the ab workout a "journey to the center of the girth."

Gym. You lost a pound this week? It's only because I always leave here too tired to go looking for it!

"When I suggested you should walk a couple of miles a day I didn't mean to just see me!"

"You need to do less talking the talk and more walking the walk."

Guy in gym

"I told him not to rely on his GPS whe out running!"

'I think dad's getting fitter. I couldn't hear him wheezing until he turned the corner today.'

'My cellulite is getting stronger.'

"Keep goin', Harry. No pain, no gain!"

Ring for Service.

"He's like having our own personal trainer. . ."

'I'm downsizing in hopes of a merger.'

"Why settle for itsy-bitsy when you could be swole as hell?"

"Our new treadmill is easy to use, you just set it to the speed setting that's most comfortable for you."

"Bear in mind there are three laws in this gym we cannot ignore: health, safety and gravity."

'she's been at that three weeks now and it hasn't moved an inch.'