Fitness Journey Start Gifts

'I'm looking to lose just enough weight so that I no longer get that inner thigh swooshing sound when I walk.'

Lady drying hair whilst on exercise bike.

'What distance! Pity it wasn't the hammer!'

Be Healthy

On the back of the t-shirt...

"If we carry them home we’ll get at least one workout."

'Eat less. Drink less. Be merry more.'

'You need to stay away from the pie in the sky.'

'If you exercise you add 10 years to your life.' - 'But I would spend the 10 years exercising.'

Exercise now!

'What'll it cost me to got in shape for yardwork season?'

'Swimming is the healthiest sport. . . Because it's the only one where you can't smoke while you're doing it.'

Exercise Bars

Tired executive going into gym coming out gleaming

"You need to lose 20 cable channels."

Man on beach realizes laying down flattens his stomach

'The doctor said you need more exercise, so I've hidden the remote control.'

Man to woman leaving health club: 'The instructor said I had lots of body definition ... plump, rotund, obese, heavy ...'

"You need to do less talking the talk and more walking the walk."

Guy in gym

"When I suggested you should walk a couple of miles a day I didn't mean to just see me!"

Jogging...

"I told him not to rely on his GPS whe out running!"

'I think dad's getting fitter. I couldn't hear him wheezing until he turned the corner today.'

'My cellulite is getting stronger.'

"Why settle for itsy-bitsy when you could be swole as hell?"

'she's been at that three weeks now and it hasn't moved an inch.'

"Keep goin', Harry. No pain, no gain!"

"Bear in mind there are three laws in this gym we cannot ignore: health, safety and gravity."

"He's like having our own personal trainer. . ."

Ring for Service.

"Our new treadmill is easy to use, you just set it to the speed setting that's most comfortable for you."

'I'm downsizing in hopes of a merger.'

How can we improve our health?