Fitness Journey Starter Gifts

"You too the first step: you bought a run-down shack in an up-and-coming location. Now you need to rehab it and get it sold."

'Tom just had his first workout at the gym.'

"I'm the 'Before' in diet ads."

Lady drying hair whilst on exercise bike.

"This feels like an accomplishment."

'What distance! Pity it wasn't the hammer!'

On the back of the t-shirt...

"If we carry them home we’ll get at least one workout."

'If you exercise you add 10 years to your life.' - 'But I would spend the 10 years exercising.'

'You need to stay away from the pie in the sky.'

Exercise now!

'What'll it cost me to got in shape for yardwork season?'

'Swimming is the healthiest sport. . . Because it's the only one where you can't smoke while you're doing it.'

Tired executive going into gym coming out gleaming

Exercise Bars

'It was at this point that the executive group began its hatha flow retreats.'

"You need to lose 20 cable channels."

Guy in gym

Jogging...

Man to woman leaving health club: 'The instructor said I had lots of body definition ... plump, rotund, obese, heavy ...'

"I told him not to rely on his GPS whe out running!"

Gym. It doesn't help when you call the ab workout a "journey to the center of the girth."

Gym. You lost a pound this week? It's only because I always leave here too tired to go looking for it!

Man on beach realizes laying down flattens his stomach

"When I suggested you should walk a couple of miles a day I didn't mean to just see me!"

'The doctor said you need more exercise, so I've hidden the remote control.'

"You need to do less talking the talk and more walking the walk."

Yoga for beginners,

'I think dad's getting fitter. I couldn't hear him wheezing until he turned the corner today.'

'My cellulite is getting stronger.'

"Bear in mind there are three laws in this gym we cannot ignore: health, safety and gravity."

"He's like having our own personal trainer. . ."

"Why settle for itsy-bitsy when you could be swole as hell?"

'I'm downsizing in hopes of a merger.'

"Our new treadmill is easy to use, you just set it to the speed setting that's most comfortable for you."