New Age Aficionados Pillows

For Witches of a Certain Age

How Rings In Nature Indicate Aging.

'I've been sitting on this mountain for 25 years, and what I've learned is that true happiness can only be found in the soothing relief of a fast-acting hemorrhoid cream!'

Boy on father's knee

'I keep thinking I'm David Icke...'

The end of innocence

The Inner Dog.

"Malachite promotes inner peace, hope and security, but I can’t say for certain it will help you put up with your boss."

The New Age Dentist.

New Age Pit Bull

"See, the problem with doing things to prolong your life is that all the extra years come at the end, when you're old."

'The bad news is you've lived well beyond your expiration date.'

Construction zone ends. Please resume following your bliss.

'Son, there's more to life than dunking, There's also making big money from ads, like Yao Ming'

New Age Anatomy...

Fortune teller sits beneath a sign 'Wrinkles Read Here'

"All the good band names are taken by microbreweries."

"No Wilson, I don't want to hear your daily mantra."

Apple Kiss

'Medical researchers discovered that the leading cause of death by aging is due to birthdays.'

"We're still working out the numerology for a name."

Another year older and you look as young as ever! Alcohol is a great preservative!

'Why John, I remember you when you were this high.'

'I gave Amy Tilly a box of candy, and she's going to be my valentine until it's gone.'

Out of order, Fountain of Youth

Elvis Costello

Astral Projection Society: In Body....Out of Body.

"We begin tonight with breaking news. LIFE has given a local teenager a rude awakening."

'You're getting older... it's a common complaint.'

'Good grief!! You're here already..?!'

'Isn't it funny how the older we get, the more we become like our mothers?'

"Finally - a faith-based initiative I can embrace."

"They say you're only as old as your face."

'This would make a great back massager.'

"There is a man at the door who needs seventeen dollars to buy some sweet grass to burn as a spiritual cleansing agent during his prayer ceremonies."