Neurodevelopmental Humor Pillows

Tourette's Rehab Center

Billy. The Kid.

On a hot day in 1941, scientists uncovered the only known remains of the elusive nerdosaurus rex,

"Been following me around all morning. I think it's the new intern."

"It's not face paint. I'm transitioning into a snow leopard."

Ostriches making out

Admissions test for the Danbury Institute of Philosophy

"Underweird bras."

"She's a dachshund-lemming mix."

'Your thesis on 'how to keep warm in winter'? Interesting.'

Aggression/Security

We interrupt this program to bring you, Tommy, a message from you teacher. Have you finished your report on frogs?

"I've outlived my conventional and alternative doctors."

'Edible food! Eeeeedible food!'

"The one time in our lives when it's acceptable to run around naked, but they dress us up like L. L. Bean catalog."

''Exercise'? -- But I hate to eat and run!'

'Leap frog? No thanks- I'm a toad.'

"Today's special is we'll pull the plug on the jukebox if someone else's music annoys you."

"Look at her...Gracie is intelligent, optimistic, ambitious..I wish she was one more thing."

Wall Street...

"Boss, can you check the address again? I have a bad feeling about this one."

'I've got an amoeba here who wants to go to Officer's Candidate School.'

"A valiant effort, Mike, but just accept that you're going bald."

''Et cetera' implies that you know much more than you really do. . .'

Smirking or Non-smirking

'Yeah, I hate change, too.'

'The wife has me on a strict 'O Negative' diet.'

Bob's mother drove him crazy - but at least she came to visit.

"Such a heavenly night I spent in your bed."

"..and you'll also need Percy here, his interpreter"

"This can't be right. I was supposed to lose 20 lbs before my next annual exam - maybe I should postpone my appointment for ... another year."

'Too much hazel, not enough nut.'

"Good news...your stool sample revealed it was only a Tootsie Roll. Bad news...I'm going to have to go back in and make sure I got it all."

"Can we be seated under a vegan painting?"

'...And now, this Surgeon-General's warning: 'Look out, you fools!''