Network Analyst Gifts

'Well, this looks like the spot where your bandwidth is getting all clogged up.'

"Thanks for considering me for the job as head of cybersecurity, but I already hacked into your network and gave myself the job."

'I'm really starting to worry about the AI-based system interface.'

'...and we believe everyone is connected by only 7,412 degrees of separation.'

Soon The Moon Will Have Cellphone Reception Better Than That One Part Of Your Commute

'We're a little weak in Borneo.'

The Anti-Agent

Robots search for people's personal information in the cloud.

'Human Error .. Yet Again.'

'To most people, 1984 is just a novel; around here it's our instruction manual.'

Olivia just hacked into the boy scouts' site and sold them 30,000 boxes of cookies.

"Just give me your wallet. Trust me, you do not want to deal with my misplaced sense of entitlement."

'With the increase in hacking, the I.T. department has proposed sealing all of our data in blister packs.'

"Does anyone know anything about spyware?"

'Now that everyone's street is online, we're mapping interiors.'

"Gosh, I can't believe it's been over 25 years since our company was dragged, kicking and screaming, into the digital age!"

"On a positive note, he's not our boss. He's the guy who stole our boss's identity."

"Check the setting. I'm sure the CIA isn't hacking into our appliances just to burn your toast."

'I don't understand. You've wasted the whole interview going on and on about what you know... I think you'd better start telling me who you know.'

"Well the good news is that we did save a little money by not investing in cyber crime protection...."

A Little Extra

'Wouldn't it be cheaper to apologise to the Middle East?'

"Good artists borrow, great artists steal."

CIA, 'Confound it, Ruggles -- we're SUPPOSED to be worrywarts'

"To retrieve password: Please answer your secret question, which is, 'what is your password?' hahahaha!"

Have you tried turning it off and on again?

"We occasionally remove content that is considered to be subversive, or a potential threat to public order and national security."

'Welcome! You are now in Shambles!'

The Best Defense

Bureau of Disappearing Civil Liberties.

Aggression/Security

"I meant the dog!"

'We just don't talk anymore, Gerald!'

'Is that a suspicious package in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?'

"Mr. Miranda....we are using 'schedule 7' to hold you on suspicion of knowing someone who knew someone who was a whistleblower...."