Communication Analysts Gifts

"We're to stop talking about 'budget cuts'. Apparently it's depressing for staff and clients..."

Shouting bombs

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

In the Guru District

"You're losing the audience. Switch to the Powerpoint presentation."

"I've seem an awful lot of movies ever since they cut them all down to two minutes."

News and Magazines. Celebrity gossip. Sports scandals. Political bickering. We're out of the "information age" and well into the "too much information age"!

"And now here's Cathie with the hypothetical portion of the news."

'If only every year was an election year.'

Press Freedom

"You know, there are other emojis."

"...And do you Sean Spicer take Kelly Anne Conway..." "The marriage of alternative facts"

Studies show foods work miracles!

Changing Minds

There's a crew here from 60 minutes and they're coming this way.

"This just in: According to a recent poll, painkillers have replaced religion as the opiate of the masses."

"What's going on Jen? Why didn't you respond to my kissing emoji?"

'Contrary to the popular view, our studies show that it is real life that contributes to violence on television.'

"I'm going to miss it when they stop warning us"

"We've won control of the congress. Our next objective is to win control of the media."

"Everything you say (or don't say) matters. Choose your words and intentions carefully."

"Britain's Got Talent is now in its tenth astonishingly brilliant year!"

"Which news channel should we watch?"

Lies/Damned Lies/Social Media

'The sole reason I haven't talked to my wife for five years, is that I was too polite to interrupt her...'

"We live in the golden age of fake news, alternative facts and spin control. Your resume is too truthful."

"Er...nothing much has happened yet today...."

'This one is for keeping 'On Message' in the spin wars.'

'My plan for the mid east has approval of both Houses of Congress, Oprah, Larry King, Lettermen and Leno.'

"I actually saw ten gay characters on television this week—which almost balanced out the 2,174 straight characters I saw."

Newspaper suicide.

'Georgy Porgy kiss 'n' tell story.'

'Apologists today said little white lies -- but not the big lie -- may have played a part in Iraq Policies....'

Fifty shades of Leveson.

"That newspaper has been showing up ever since you started reading the news online. I think it feels betrayed."