Nervous Testers Gifts

I'd prefer to do my test on foot.

Yomp Foundation Presentation committee: 'Don't let the gong intimidate you!'

"I don't know what I'm going to do...my presentation is due on Monday and I haven't even started...I'm not sure I know how to speak."

'G-g-golly! One day out of med school and I'm about to perform brain surgery! Just look at that scalpel shake!'

"Your IQ came back negative."

'Apparently, my wine-tasting computer liked the '86 Haut Brion a bit too much - it didn't leave any for us.'

'Should I try a three point turn?' - 'Better not, we only have 30 minutes left.'

'Half-crazed with nerves Petey Otterloop awaits the start of the winter concert.'

'Women cook to feed the soul...men cook to feed the ego.'

"Stop telling me how well you did on the written."

'Every time he lectures about serotonin, he puts me to sleep.'

'The new helium airbag was a mistake.'

'Tell me a little bit about yourself.'

I'm a seat warmer test dummy.

'You two will have lots in common - you share the same anxiety neurosis.'

"Patient. . . seems. . . reluctant. . . to get his. . . prostate. . . checked. . ."

"Of course, I would suggest a shot of novacaine."

"You did very well on your I.Q. test. You're a man of 49 with the intelligence of a man of 53."

Blower wars.

'That's just for videos, Jeffrey -- book reports don't have to have FBI warnings.'

'I rushed right over from my third try at the bar exam as soon as I heard you were here.'

'No matter how often I do the show, I still suffer from stage fright...'

Meat. No, I have no idea what the heck you just shoved in your mouth, I'm giving away toothpicks. Free samples.

'It's to protect me from the splattering. Now open wide.'

'This 'chicken' stuff isn't bad -- it tastes like dinosaur!'

'You could work at any fortune 500 company... Why have you applied at our little shop?'

"Our next act...Cruzini, the world's greatest magician!"

After his career as a wrestling pro, Hank 'Iron Claw' Hammersmith found a new job at the touchscreen test department.

Idlewild.

"How did the acupuncture session go, Sebastian?"

Foot in ice cube.

'What if I want to stop? Where's the pause button?'

"If you hear me scream . . . Dear God, Jesus Christ, what are you doing, then I want you to apply your foot to the brake!"

It was an unlikely relationship from the beginning and doomed to failure once the novelty wore off."

'The sun... hung bel... belligerently... over the... dust... dusty town...'