Nervous Laugh Enthusiast Pillows

Melvin's Glue-all

"Oh, I like coming to the dentists. It's the only place where people actually ask me to spit!"

'I've been a nervous rex all day.'

"Take two pies to the face and call me in the morning."

"I don't know whether to be mad that you had water this whole time or impressed with your commitment to the joke."

King and Jester

'I see we've got some techies in tonight.'

"It's funny 'cos it's true!"

"Ok, ok, how's everyone feeling tonight besides a thousand dollars poorer?"

"How's this? Hot enough for you?"

'I see you've managed to cut your coffee consumption in half.'

'A friendly reminder, Mr. Parker: There's only room for one long, raucous, 'what-a-stupid-question' laugh in this company, and it's not yours.'

"...dry your eyes, m'boy, and always remember: Laugh, and the world laughs with you. Weep, and the world laughs AT you."

'What have I told you about laughing on purpose, Mother?'

Flytrap nerd.

'That's odd. For most people, getting a pet helps lower blood pressure.'

Social median

"Open mike night"

'You are here' T-shirt,

'Oh dear, it looks like the men have been talking about work again.'

"All her other suitors could sing and dance of course, but Mummy chose me because I made her laugh as well..."

Kid has pot stuck on his head.

'Dinner for two, table for seven.'

"The feel of mud and weeds between my toes just really freaks me out."

Bucky's dream of becoming a stand-up comedian ended abruptly the very first time he stepped into the spotlight.

'OK, who's that at the back not clowning around?'

'Sir, making mistakes is a craft, but making things up the way we do is art.'

"It's just the milk talking."

Fish Pedicure

Estate Agents - Now in!! Affordable houses (flooded).

'Summited Mount Everest, did you? Was that just the one time?'

'Before your honor passes sentence, is the anything my client could do for extra credit, if you know what I mean?'