Neatness Avoider Gifts

'Yeah, I guess I have kind of let it go.'

A tube of toothpaste doesn't reach its full potential until in the hands of a baby.

College kid rakes up his clothes on the floor in messy dorm room

Raptures

Cat mistakes bars for toilets.

"I'm guessing you're a germaphobe?"

"Yeah, I keep a clean desk. Now all the mess is in the computer!"

Pets are not only good companions, they're good excuses.

'I want to go out of town so that I can become a fully independent person, but near enough so that I can bring my laundry home.'

The life-changing magic of shoving everything into a huge Hefty bag and leaving it for somebody else to deal with.

'I'm defragging my wardrobe.'

Anal Retentives Assoc.

"And that's why we don't have nice things."

Decluttering. . .

"I still haven't cleaned up from the party."

Wow, look what you've stepped in: Boy I'm glad I'm not the one having to lick it off...

'As a bachelor I have to wash my own clothes, clean my own room. The do it all again three months later.'

"....and Brian, down there, is just here to even out our grid."

"My neighborhood is getting too noisy. Traffic, screaming kids, barking dogs … I'm used to living in quiet desperation."

"Yesterday's clothes, which weren't quite dirty enough to wash, or clean enough to put away" "The day before yesterday's clothes" "A parcel you have forgotten to send back" "Your sense of inner peace and harmony" "Clothes from the day before that" "A beloved sock, last seen in February 2023"

"We have to face reality. Unless we invite people over, we will never muster the energy to clean the place."

'Sorry about the blindfolds girls, but I haven't had time to tidy up.'

'Been coming here for years and never bumped into anyone who knows me . . . weird!'

Organised Crime and Disorganised Crime

I don't get it. You can make a goal from one end of the field to the other, but you can't hit the laundry basket six inches away.

"I'm just going to stay in the car until all the bees die off."

'I went to the city once, but I couldn't get used to the crowds'.

'That's the plan then, gang. We all move in with Bruno on bath nights!'

'Nature makes me nervous!'

"We can't stay. Charles freaks out without some electronic device beeping or blinking at him."

The pair of socks waited confidently in the corner, secure in the knowledge that no matter what happens, no one ever suspects the socks.

'I had a wardrobe malfunction. I lost my pocket protector.'

Too posh to wash...