Cleaning Avoiders Gifts

A tube of toothpaste doesn't reach its full potential until in the hands of a baby.

Fear of housework.

Pets are not only good companions, they're good excuses.

College kid rakes up his clothes on the floor in messy dorm room

Cat mistakes bars for toilets.

"Mummy said dinner was brussels sprouts tonight. What about we drop by the park and see if the old man sitting on the bench can feed us instead?"

"I can skip my bath. On the way home I jumped in all the puddles."

'Classic literature for D.I.Y. haters'

'I want to go out of town so that I can become a fully independent person, but near enough so that I can bring my laundry home.'

The life-changing magic of shoving everything into a huge Hefty bag and leaving it for somebody else to deal with.

'My next song is a little ditty about why I don't have any references,'

"And that's why we don't have nice things."

"I'm doing a Kickstopper project!" "What?" "I was going to write a book... but do we really need another book in this world? So... Kickstopper—people donate money to stop me from writing. I won't write it so I'll never ask you to read it. I'd pay money to not read your book. Thanks." "You're welcome." "I'm also starting projects to not start a band, not write poetry and not tell you about my dreams."

'As a bachelor I have to wash my own clothes, clean my own room. The do it all again three months later.'

"I still haven't cleaned up from the party."

Wow, look what you've stepped in: Boy I'm glad I'm not the one having to lick it off...

"We have to face reality. Unless we invite people over, we will never muster the energy to clean the place."

"Yesterday's clothes, which weren't quite dirty enough to wash, or clean enough to put away" "The day before yesterday's clothes" "A parcel you have forgotten to send back" "Your sense of inner peace and harmony" "Clothes from the day before that" "A beloved sock, last seen in February 2023"

I don't get it. You can make a goal from one end of the field to the other, but you can't hit the laundry basket six inches away.

'Why can't you do that while I'm on the golf course?'

'Been coming here for years and never bumped into anyone who knows me . . . weird!'

'I went to the city once, but I couldn't get used to the crowds'.

The pair of socks waited confidently in the corner, secure in the knowledge that no matter what happens, no one ever suspects the socks.

'Yeah, I guess I have kind of let it go.'

'That's the plan then, gang. We all move in with Bruno on bath nights!'

"It says it's sick and tired of telling me to update my software and if I don't do it right now it's going to explode."

"Tia Carmen, don't they say that we're made of dust?"

"You're in my laundry's favorite seat."

'My last book did not have a happy ending. I had to pay a fine.'

"Me, I'm not nocturnal by nature, but by choice: I try to avoid human-contact as much as I can..."

"With my tech skills, I just feel my talents would be wasted on mundane tasks like taking out the trash, cutting the grass and cleaning my room."

Healthy Eating Centre Notice - Keep off the grease.

'We'd be crazy to vacuum now.'

"What? Speak up! I can't hear you! I'm getting outside interference!"

'I put a dab of Pine-Sol behind each ear and my husband thinks I've been cleaning all day.'