Neatness Advocate Gifts

'I'm defragging my wardrobe.'

"The striptease I like! The clothes on the floor I'm not wild about."

Santa Claus's wife beats the soot out of his beard.

The Cougher

Raptures

'I just finished the floors, so they better stay clean!'

'Oh, just chuck it in a corner somewhere...'

"Before you go anywhere, did you lick behind your ears?"

"...when you're through in there, my kids room could use a demonstration too."

'I know my instruments are sterilized every day but I have no idea who does it.'

In the art gallery

"I'm guessing you're a germaphobe?"

"Yeah, I keep a clean desk. Now all the mess is in the computer!"

'No we didn't get high definition TV - the wife dusted the screen.'

"I hate all the paperwork there is with this job."

"Sorry, but it is not negotiable! You have to let Tim clean your teeth twice a day!"

Man brushing the teeth of his reflection.

Anal Retentives Assoc.

'My mom invented baths!'

'Only peanut butter and jelly fingers, Sir.'

The Messy Sink

Decluttering. . .

"I'm Hygienia, the good witch of the north."

'I'm just draining the reservoir.'

"....and Brian, down there, is just here to even out our grid."

Medieval Torture

Leaving my favorite restaurant, I note rats arriving for the night shift.

'Beware of the Dog poo'

School janitor empties numbers out of math room waste basket.

'Sorry about the blindfolds girls, but I haven't had time to tidy up.'

"How many times did I tell you? Don't put the outdated chargers in the drawer for broken headphones."

"Ok, ok, I'll use a bloody coaster!"

"I asked at reception for the person who runs the school... and they sent me to you!"

'Don't mind my husband, he just wants to be 65!'

Man waiting for final leaf of autumn to fall.