Navigating Singlehood Pillows

Life is for the birds.

"Maybe the next one will be a singles cruise."

"It's the sequel to 'Cooking for One'."

Still searching for my Prince Charming.

"All the good ones are either married, gay or Viggo Mortensen."

"Alone bad. Boyfriend good!"

"Yes, I'm alone."

"Life is too short! Why should I waste my time frantically searching for a mate when I can create art instead..."

No boyfriend, can't be bothered t-shirt

"Do you know what girls want?"

"At this point, I think a rich lightweight would be fine."

'On the contrary, soap operas are a great time-saver -- you don't have to get married and have your OWN problems.'

"I had half a date last weekend."

"Honey who needs a man when you've got... Rhythm!"

"I had guys chase my tail, then one day I thought, hey, dummy, get rid of the middlemen and chase your own tail!"

'Are you seeing anybody?'

"Being a refrigerator magnet is fine, but I wish, for just one day, I could be a chick magnet."

'I'm thinking the bee beard is the main reson that you're still single'

'We fed your application in, and the computer started leaking slime.'

A father and son in a car packed with thier possessions

"Rose wants to bring up the child on her own."

"I'm a free woman. Edgar tried to cross the road."

'Complements of the big smelly gentleman.'

"The dinner date was a disaster! I realised he was still a "Mama's Boy" when I saw he was expecting me to regurgitate his food..."

Two children arguing - 'My dad's more absent than your dad'

'And then after we were married for a couple of years your father ran away to join the circus.'

'Dear Dairy, Well... I met someone, and I think she could be Mrs. Alright.'

'Not only is your mojo not working, it apparently has been unemployed for years.'

"Finally - my dating app just launched a 'Why am I seeing this loser?' feature."

Augmented reality check

She hated first dates. She always ended up sounding desperate.

'You asked her to go out with you?', 'Yes, but she says there's a lengthy approval process.'

He's Tasty!