Nautical Narrative Navigator Gifts

'You're doing what? You realise you're establishing a tedious journalistic clich?, don't you?'

'The church says the Earth is flat, but I know that it is round for I have seen the shadow on the Moon, and I have more faith in a shadow than in the Church.'

Captain in a storm

"Mind the whale, dear."

"I remember when the death of the hero meant the end of the sequels. Now it marks the beginning of the prequels."

'Are we there yet?'

Characters jumping out of a book.

"Eww - that whale's breath smells awful!" "You could use a breath mint yourself, lady!"

"As I was only saying the other day..."

"Just one more thump. . . just one more thump."

Goldfish bowl on raft...

How can I enjoy that clean, fresh, salt air when I'm up to my neck in garbage?

"More rescue efforts, less screenplay."

Library - Political Science section - 'What to do until the spin doctor comes'

'Slip Ahoy!'

'I'm not being punished! I'm reading because I happen to enjoy reading!'

'Well, it wasn't my lucky day... first there was that shark and then I bimped into a bunch of beaver!'

"We have a potentially serious problem accruing on the poop deck."

"Touché"

'It's true what they say: People often look like their pets...'

"We've done a rigorous examination of your business plan using the latest algorithms to model future profits. . . which way up would you like it?"

"What your memoir really needs is an addiction."

"This is a great school but it wasn't my first choice."

'Listen Honey! Sounds like there might be a little white water close by!'

The writers group met every Tuesday for support and fellowship.

Ishmael's First Day on the Pequod was Full of Surprises: "A harpoon!? Don't you practice catch and release?"

"That was too many fresh original voices for one night."

Captain looks out of a porthole and notices that the ship is sinking.

Moustached gentleman

Saved...life is good!

Titanic: How's my steering.

"This is an excellent story, Doris, so far."

"You're on a low sodium diet so watch the salty talk."

Pirates: "To absent Limbs."

"I feel that I have at least one more unpublished novel in me."