Nature's Janitor Fan Gifts

'I don't understand: Everyone stopped when I joined the food-fight at school...'

A vampire sitting on a park bench at night feeding bats.

"I love you too, big guy."

Happy Holidays from Sanitary Claus!

"I know. Let's wait here until we evolve to an upright position. Then we could reach it."

'When I was a Scout, we had to blaze trails without sticky notes.'

"Exactly how undecided would you say you were at this precise moment?"

Camping-Pong

"I got ninety-nine problems, but a birch ain't one!"

'We have Vanilla, Chocolate and Strawberry on your choice of Cedar, Oak or Elm cone...'

An expecting Flower wearing a 'Baby here, arrow t-shirt' saying BUD

'Don't you have a better escape plan than that?'

Wildlife A-Z: 'Where the heck are zebras?'

Trees: The most effective way to reduce emissions.

"Do you know a good chiropractor?"

"These songbirds every morning at five A.M. would be really annoying if they weren't so damn talented."

Bear who goes drinking instead of hibernating

"May I come back in? I'm sorry I said that thing about your breath."

Incorrect weather forecasts.

Tortoise polishing his shell

Beavers worshipping a chainsaw.

Mamoose...

"Is the salmon fresh?"

Loggerheads

Leadership never hibernates.

"I'm more of a day owl."

Aargh, Many Trees

Newton discovers deforestation.

"Nature can be cruel, but occasionally there are instances of great compassion."

'You know there was time there, about 40,000 years ago, when we could have completely wiped them out if we had put our minds to it.'

Ted enjoyed going to the park and feeding the woodpeckers.

'My pine scented spray keeps the bugs away, but what do I do about the beavers?'

'Okay, who didn't flush the toilet?'

"Sorry Ma'am, but lamb delivery is only available in Spring..."

Just north of the rainforest: the mostly-sunny-with-a-30%-chance-of-rainforest