Nature's Chaos Fan Gifts

Incorrect weather forecasts.

Computer Room.

"So last Christmas it was those Cabbage Patch Kids."

"Are you sure you want to see the kitchen? The chef is naked."

Herding lava back to the fire pit.

'I didn't have time to prepare a resume.'

"These songbirds every morning at five A.M. would be really annoying if they weren't so damn talented."

I see the Boris moon arising. . .

"You get one every time you order something online."

"Nature can be cruel, but occasionally there are instances of great compassion."

Ted enjoyed going to the park and feeding the woodpeckers.

RING! RING! RING!: 'Not the cell phone AGAIN!'

Cat attacks dog reading on a bench.

'Cut that out! Every time you jump in our pool, we have to refill it!'

'Try rebooting.'

Leaf Blower.

“Putty took a wife. Her name was Possums, and she bore him Little Gentleman, Biddy Boo, Savor Tooth, Fluffy, Harry Cat, and Cesar. Then Little Gentleman begat Little Gentleman II and Friday and Tinkle Toes and Possum Tail and…”

"Oh my god- the salad's on fire!"

Bruce's Building - Doug's Demolition

Bad mannered dog embarrasses visiting nuns.

They decided to give up on public transport to get to work and rely on continental drift instead.

'How could I have known that the nozzle on my hair spray can would stick open?'

"I don't care what you say. It's not Christmas until I see the first fist fight at Walmart."

"Close the door woman! There's a weasel outbreak!"

How would you like your offspring served

'You just had to start digging, didn't you?!'

"April fool! . . . it'll melt. . ."

Thanks again and I'm really sorry about the tree. I thought it was a giant piece of broccoli.

"I only have six screws left."

The Painter