Natural Disaster Planner Gifts

'This is a fine time to think we should have bought a houseboat!'

"It's official"..."It's a drought!"

Another long day down at the Bureau of Earthquake Prediction.

"Fred's calculating what future natural catastrophes he can ignore based on his probably life span."

65 Million Years Ago

IRMA Hurricane Recovery in Cuba

Department of No One Could Have Anticipated

"I can see our house from here."

Experts through the ages.

Catastrophe Risk Insurance

What's your contingency plan, Randy? My what? If a calamity of biblical proportions were to strike here in Canardville, would you flee across the bridge to Candorville? Or would you search in vain for a fallout-resistant bunker, before surrendering to the cruel inevitability of your demise? I ask just for the sake of discussion. No reason to panic. Totally unrelated: I just found out someone who's definitely not me is selling fallout bunkers at buy-this-now-if-you-want-to-live.com. Very bad man.

Wally flunks the test: The Emergency Broadcast System.

Tsunami Evac Route

"What, no day spa? And you call this a luxury bunker."

"My God, now what?"

Lesser Known Active Volcanoes.

'Our policy is quite plain. We don't pay out on claims we can't pronounce.'

"We'll cross that bridge when we come to it!"

Japan Disaster: Japanese fighting Nuclear Grim Reaper.

"Yee yee hee hee how how yip yip."

'Have you filed an environmental impact statement for this flood?'

Climate Change Contingency House

"....rather than spend millions on a potentially fruitless effort to avoid flooding we've decided to focus on public safety!"

"On the other hand, voting to fund disaster relief would violate my conservative principles."

Tornado Season in America.

'Pretend you don't notice San Andreas.'

Goldfish Insurance: " We must insure against a deluge of BIBLICAL proportions. . ."

Good News/Bad News: Crisis Control Center

'Of course the scientists have got this all wrong about climate change.'

"But part of me hopes there never is an Armageddon."

Extraterrestrial kicks rocks on his planet, which turn into meteors crashing to earth.

"The asteroid will hit in 2032, but I’m prepared!"

Lady leaving a crisis management office past an emergency panic button.

"OK, now here comes the lava."

'Should we upgrade the levees or just go hydroponic?'