National Security Officer Gifts

What's in a Terrorist Name?

"National security adviser"

"One more time, Mr Claus - who sold you the data?"

'You know too much,'

"This is probably not the time to admit I only joined the force because I figured we'd just be chasing cat burglars."

Airport Security.

"Does anyone know anything about spyware?"

TSA Noah

The Scanner Of Love.

'Nobody ever before had took much notice of Granny's homemade flour-sack bloomers.'

'To hear our privacy policy, please tell us you credit card and social security numbers...'

Scarecrows guarding a field

Updated Stories. The Wicked Witch Of The West Tries A New Tactic To Get The Ruby Slippers. Security Checkpoint. Remove your shoes, please.

"I spy with my little eye…"

The Jose Padilla Experience

"Thanks for considering me for the job as head of cybersecurity, but I already hacked into your network and gave myself the job."

"Since we installed the video surveillance system we're losing fewer socks."

Presidential surveillance ass!"

Legalish

"With the fortune we have spent in technology, informers and spies around the world, how is it possible that you still haven't found where the heck is Wally?"

'We have some facts about you that you don't remember, some that you thought were really secret, and some that never even happened.'

SWAT Team (going in to catch a fly).

'Come on inspector, you call this fair?'

'What the … ? How did those thugs get into my car?'

"I don't need your resume. Your current employer forwarded me a ton of security video that you're featured in."

Official Rhetoric About Leakers and Whistleblowers, Translated

'Who handles your media, Rex?'

'We want more police on our streets!' 'WHAT?! Do you have any idea how dangerous it is out there?'

"Could you have a quick look at my molar? I can't afford a dental x-ray."

"I don't care if Sales thinks you're a superhero, the cape violates the dress code and the mask is a security violation."

"Hold it right there! Our legislature is currently considering new measures to protect children from the insidious ravages of cell phones in schools!"

You are Here. We know where you've been.

Billgeville's new pedestrian monkey bars not only reduced accidents but also whipped people into great shape.

'Knowledge is the ultimate weapon. Next!'

"What makes you think this could be a suspect package?"