National Ombudsman Gifts

Ombuds (door) man.

"On a more positive note the guidance we’ve published on the services we can’t provide is published in 37 different languages."

"Mom, Dad, this is Kevin, our new ombudsman."

The simultaneous development of dining and pomposity.

How many workers does it take to put up a Christmas decoration?

"That's the Ommbudsman."

"Before you speak to the manager, we want to congratulate you on being our one millionth irate customer."

'No, we don't take complaints, we SELL complaints.. If the sign said POPCORN, you wouldn't try to GIVE me popcorn, would you?'

Hit by a golf ball and injured...

The Tin Ombudsman.

'Of course I care, madam!'

Global Stress Test

Sharings,,,formerly complaints,

'He's a mixed breed.'

"I invent things to complain about."

Customer Service - 'No - I demand to speak to your real manager!'

'I hope it's a quick knockout, I'm double parked.'

Mrs. Cohen you've got some spots on your larynx. What is it, doctor? Oh, good news. I'm not a doctor. Just a nurse. Good news. Under your plan, if you're seeing a doctor, it's already too late. @#$! HMO!

Professional Couples

Press Complaints Commission

"Look, I'm always happy to help customers with their problems. But you're talking to the wrong idiot."

'And you've written to the council on this one.'

Ombudswoman

'Now, what's your complaint?'

Complaint Windows

'As you see, it's just a stone's throw from your embassy.'

"Hmm, based on the wine you're looking for, how did you get in here?"

"I quite agree - the weather has been pretty dreadful lately."

Angel Stands In Line At Hell's Complaints Desk

"Complaints about the industry have gone through the roof!"

Oftrack - 'It's the body that deals with derailment complaints!'

'See?!? Another tragic school shooting just proves my point about concealed weapons on campus!'

"First of all, I don't like sitting behind this window all day."

'Who do I complain to about you?'

"Could you make your complaint about poor customer service later?"