Narrative Aficionado T-Shirts

'In lieu of a Christmas bonus, I'm going to read you a story.'

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

"It's a heck of a tale...and well told, but we don't publish resumes."

Edgar Allen Poe

King Henry and his Cheshire bride

'Look! The new long awaited, highly anticipated but ultimately disappointing novel by that guy you like.'

'Don't worry, you're safe. I started my diet today.'

Trilby - 'The old studio'.

"I'm just saying. This would be even MORE romantic if we couldn't see in the dark."

'I know we're inchworms, but let's get into the spirit of this! Change is good!'

'It's a novel based on a movie adapted from a magazine article that was inspired by a video game.'

Archeologist Deciphers Limerick Heiroglyphs

Treasure Island Book.

'I'll blurb you if you'll blurb me.'

Meet the author - celebrity autobiographies,

"No chips, but I did snag the new Hiaasen."

"Tracey, this is Gene. He also read the Nancy Reagan book in unbound galleys."

Junk art/ food/ tv/ music/ amusements/ novels/ views/ life.

Mantis Love

"You have no idea what it's like to be a 'just between you and me' person in a 'just between you and I' world."

"He was a big man, but he moved like a cat."

My Literary Influences

Tesseract of the D'Urbervilles.

Ironing Punctuation

'I can hold a match to his notebook.'

Trilby - 'The sweet melodic phrase.'

Toys were me: lessons learned never growing up

Fyodor Dostoevsky

Frontispiece to 'Dombey and Son'

'He speaks for our entire generation. Pity he's such a bore...'