Nail Polish Queen Gifts

'Did you notice how her pink nail polish clashes with her red tricycle?'

"Good" "Bad" "Work on it" "Keep working - maybe it's not as bad as you think it is" "Put it to a committee" "Give up" "Make it worse" "Make it better" "Still a bad idea" "Overthink it" "Throw yourself into a pit of wild badgers" "Throw it away" "Call it done" "Sigh."

"Bed Spread"

Housewife feeding her washing machine with a brief.

A Manicure

'Ok. Now I'm sexy.'

Clubbing

'Well you tried, but be sure to keep Proof of Purchase.'

Sign # 23 that you've spent too much time at a game: your nails are longer than your fingers and your hair touches your ankles.

'You're on Deck! Wilson! Hurry up with that pedicure!'

"Relax. I'm just here to trim your nails."

'I grow all our tomatoes. I grow all our spinach. All you do is complain about the cost of my twice weekly manicures.'

Being Pampered.

Granny Wear

Level up your game with a MANicure.

Lance Armstrong: the later years.

"Mom, does granddad want me to run away? He's playing that Disco music again!"

'I live in an apartment. Do you have 'Good ApartmentKeeping'?'

'A moral dilemma? Tell me more, more. I adore more.'

'Now, will you consider cutting your toenails?'

"Attention: The Captain has turned off the hokey-pokey light. You are now free to shake it all about."

'So what are you doing tonight, babe?'

"HEY!!! That's not my color!!!"

Nail Clippers Circle Like Sharks.

'Not again?!! A perfectly good game spoilt by dirty fingernails.'

Beauty Time

Housewife

"I wondered why she kept giggling to herself all the time she was knitting my new sweater."

Your call is very important to us. It allows our nails to dry while we keep you on hold.

"Will these hooves ever dry?"

"I got a manicure."

'When I said I was looking forward to a woman's touch about the place . . .'

"Mom sent us over while she gets the carpet cleaned."

'Usually, elevator music isn't that catchy...'

Mrs. Big Foot