Mythical Narrative Fan Gifts

Dragon roasts a chicken impaled on a knight's sword.

Viking on beach with rubber ring shaped like viking ship.

"Will you have a Sphinx?"

"Hey, it's not all fire and brimstone anymore—one of our nine circles is even smoke-free."

Swiss army knife

No time for sirtaki now, Greece!

"And maybe throw in a talking snake to make sure they don't take it literally."

The Beer Garden of Eden: "This hard cider is life-changing. Try a sip."

"You have to declare what you rob from the rich, but you can deduct what you give to the poor."

'Ignore it! It's just some of the local kids trying to get in for free.'

'Gosh, I dunno. You sure it's organic?'

Bob woke up in a pile of notes, some scrawled so quickly that no one could decode them. He remembered nothing of the night before, except... yes, a fleeting glimpse of the writer's moon.

Hot Tub Frosty

'Now that's what I call a really old tree!'

'No, I won't be celebrating St George's Day.'

Going Down?

"Underwater Childbirth Ward."

"Sorry Darling, you are fabulous, but I'm searching for MY Prince too!"

'Not only will you know everything but I'll see that you get your own talk show.'

'I said, you're supposed to be in the underworld.'

"And make sure you get my daughter home before sunrise..!"

Adam and Eve, as old people.

Moses parting the waves and trolleys appear on the sea bed!

"So do you still think 'rising sea levels' is a bunch of baloney?"

"Um, latest update Noah: the Warrumwarbler is now extinct."

"That's weird. The app says to look for a Nissan Sentra."

"It's creepy thinking that Santa can sneak into my house undetected. I must find out how he does it!"

"He's So Your Type."

"It's a blood curdling novel about the brutal murder of a publisher who rejected a book about the brutal murder of a publisher..."

Viking River Raids

"I dropped my goblet!"

HOLY LAND INSURANCE CO. , 'Darn you, Methuselah! -- You've completely

'Careful, the plate is really hot.'