Mythical Menu Lover T-Shirts

'Gluten-free manna will come in the second salvo.'

Kitchen Kapers

The Witches Discover The Wok

Party time.

'For a small extra charge, we can provide a specially-formulated digestive enzyme.'

"We have; pulled pork, enticed chicken, persuaded lamb, bullied beef, cajoled Turkey..."

'Men order. . . women shop.'

'We don't know which gate flight 311 to Denver is boarding. These are the menus.'

'How is the water prepared?'

"The secret of my success is combining eggs, meat and bread in enough ways to make an eight page breakfast menu."

"Tell me what you think of the menu. I wrote it."

"Just a pinch, Helga ... spicy eye of newt doesn't agree with me."

"Oh, but we could be so good together...!"

"I'm a strict vegan with dietary limitations due to specific food allergies. What should I get?" "A taxi."

"Mum, why can't we just have a normal Sunday roast like other families?"

'Tonight's menu is bound in Moroccan leather, with a touch of Flemish calligraphy on hand made paper.'

'Creme brulee! You're the best Mum!'

"Do you have something for somebody with no palette, no taste and no money?"

'Shall I bring two children's meals, or will Madam regurgitate her own?'

'Carb or non-carb section?'

'. . . the Winter of Discontent Soup, Arab Spring Roll, Summer Madness Salad and The Season of Mellow Mists Fruit Medley.'

'One businessman's lunch and one lackey's lunch.'

"All I've got left is smoked."

"Sure we could just print out the specials, but the chef doesn't want to leave a paper trail."

"Hey Maurice! Take the menu, replace 'dish of the day' with 'local free range speciality' and double the price!"

Coven ready - Witch in supermarket with a 'coven ready' chicken

'The cauldron is just for the sauce - I do the rest in my microwave.'

Hand coming out of chandelier pulls cover off waiter's food.

'I'll have the mystery meat with anonymous vegetables.'

CIA Cafeteria: 'It's nice of you to ask, but the recipe is classified.'

Meditation Munchies

"Mom, Dad, can we stop reading the reviews, I'm hungry!"

"Yes, I can certainly recommend the lamb - everything else has gone."