Mystical Minds Gifts

"Out today due to foreseen circumstances."

Palmistry & Botany Grammar. Palm reader. Palm reader.

Man can levitate but can't hold fingers properly.

Clairvoyant - Closed until God Knows When.

Woman being hypnotised at Hypnotism section in library.

'I've forgotten the recipe.'

"Oops! The system just crashed!"

'I see lots of weapons of mass malarky.'

'I've got to go to an eye doctor. I can now only see the present, not the past and the future.'

Fortune teller sits beneath a sign 'Wrinkles Read Here'

Pet psychic -- yup, she's for real.

'I'm seeing 37 facebook requests from the afterlife !'

"Just come out and talk. I promise I won't wish for anything."

"The sweater you knit him will be thrown out in February."

A boy acting suspiciously

'Son, it's time we had that little talk about ornithology and entomology.'

Quantum Psychic

'I'm not playing 'Bride and Groom' unless you sign this pre-nuptial aggreement!'

'There is no past. No future. Only the present, which is changing every instant. Time is merely an illusion. Got it?'

'How much stuff can I get away with and still go to heaven?'

"Finally, Miss Big-Shot calls her dead mother!"

"That's how humans reproduce? But, there's three of them..."

Madame ZuZu. Dream Interpretation. Tarot. Palms. She says the dream where I'm taking a test naked means I barely made it through school.

"Daddy, instead of the princess story tonight, can you explain how and why manifest destiny eliminated the American Indians?"

Conspiracy Theory Bookstore: JFK, Princess Di, and Osama Bin Laden.

"Ok, so I go back and forth… Then what?"

'I want to find out what the formula was I wrote yesterday on the blackboard and was erased by the custodian.'

'Yeah, bit how does the stork get into the maternity room?'

"Why do small children ask so many questions?" "Why not? We need to learn, don’t we? Anyway it’s no big deal is it? Isn’t that what parents are for? You were probably the same, weren’t you? So why complain?"

'What's the fist thing you're going to think of when your brain is fully formed?'

Through the Looking Glass - The White Knight and The Red Knight Battle.

"OK, now what's the meaning of the other eight?"

Science of Little Round Things

"You know, statistically speaking, at least one of these gingerbread men is gay."

"Mam? What's love juice?"