Mystic Arts Fan Gifts

'I guess I don't need to tell you that you got the job.'

'Any minute now I'll be getting a headache.'

'I sense that someone is about to swindle you.' 'Wow, thanks for the warning! How much do I owe you?'

'The cutbacks begin to affect wizards.'

'Oh, no - I have to read each tentacle - that'll be extra, of course.'

"I see a pretty lady who looks a lot like you....a very kind lady...and she's adopting what appears to be a box of adorable kittens!"

"So how much money have you made from your psychic hotline business?"

"Did you have a cat?"

'I'm sorry, Madam Zola. I'm afraid you no longer have second sight.'

'Before we begin, let me see what my fortune cookie says.'

Nikolay Rerih

'You will meet a sexy, honest fortune teller who will take all your money!'

'I see a carefree lifestyle by a quiet lake. No, wait, my mistake - looks like I called up the real estate section.'

"I'm afraid your wife gets to say 'I told you so.'"

'I see people laughing at you.'

"Oh, a resume is not necessary. I know all about you."

'My secret is putting the toil in first and adding the trouble just as it comes to a boil.'

Dr. Prebish didn't always fit in with the other scientists.

'Reeta can tell your fortune from your bank statements.'

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: The Graeae

Fortune Tellers Convention

"...He appears to have stepped away from his body."

"We don't do that kind of cattle futures, ma'am. You want Madam Mystic down the street."

"Yes, I see where you left your phone."

'This time last year you told me that I would meet a tall handsome stranger. Now I need his name and address.'

'The crystal reveals you spend your money foolishly. That will be twenty-five dollars, please.

'Okay folks, this is as high as we go.'

"Out bending spoons at Pop's diner."

"Wow. That guy on psychic chat line is really good. He told me our next phone bill would be bigger than usual!"

Your karma will catch up with you!

"It's a bit of a scam. They sell the crystal ball at cost, then nail you on the price of replacement psych-ink cartridges."

'Fortune cookies aren't fun for me. I always know my fortune in advance.'