Mystical Arts Fan Gifts

'Let's set aside the role as the 'Bringer of Death' and explore your desire to dance,'

'Stay out of electric storms.'

'Any minute now I'll be getting a headache.'

'I sense that someone is about to swindle you.' 'Wow, thanks for the warning! How much do I owe you?'

'The cutbacks begin to affect wizards.'

"I see a pretty lady who looks a lot like you....a very kind lady...and she's adopting what appears to be a box of adorable kittens!"

"Did you have a cat?"

"So how much money have you made from your psychic hotline business?"

'I'm sorry, Madam Zola. I'm afraid you no longer have second sight.'

'Before we begin, let me see what my fortune cookie says.'

'You will meet a sexy, honest fortune teller who will take all your money!'

Nikolay Rerih

'I see a carefree lifestyle by a quiet lake. No, wait, my mistake - looks like I called up the real estate section.'

'Hold it right there, pal! I had a vision that your check is going to bounce, so you can just head right back to your car!'

'I see people laughing at you.'

Fortunes. Tarot. Palms. You punched the fortune teller just because he was smiling? I always wanted to strike a happy medium.

"I'm afraid your wife gets to say 'I told you so.'"

"Oh, a resume is not necessary. I know all about you."

'My secret is putting the toil in first and adding the trouble just as it comes to a boil.'

Dr. Prebish didn't always fit in with the other scientists.

"...He appears to have stepped away from his body."

'Reeta can tell your fortune from your bank statements.'

'I guess I don't need to tell you that you got the job.'

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: The Graeae

Fortune Tellers Convention

"We don't do that kind of cattle futures, ma'am. You want Madam Mystic down the street."

"Yes, I see where you left your phone."

"Out bending spoons at Pop's diner."

'This time last year you told me that I would meet a tall handsome stranger. Now I need his name and address.'

"Wow. That guy on psychic chat line is really good. He told me our next phone bill would be bigger than usual!"

Your karma will catch up with you!

'The crystal reveals you spend your money foolishly. That will be twenty-five dollars, please.

"It's a bit of a scam. They sell the crystal ball at cost, then nail you on the price of replacement psych-ink cartridges."

"Now then, which life are you on?"

'Fortune cookies aren't fun for me. I always know my fortune in advance.'