Myrmecologist At Heart T-Shirts

"Fred, I think you're spending altogether too much time down here with these mushrooms!"

"An everything Martini, please."

"Damn those dugout Martinis!"

'I said they're good, but expensive.'

"You know what they say, time flies when you're having rum!"

An experimentalist alarms his guests by describing the appearance of the mushrooms in a dish they have just eaten.

Onion operation.

Praying Mantis.

'No, I didn't get a presidential pardon, but I got something better. God has forgiven me.'

"Stop following me, please! I'm going to the toilet!"

Reflex Testing -"...and you're sure you can't feel it"

"I just want to know if I'm healthy enough for bacon?"

Mushrooms of New York

"...Also, true love is eventually tax deductible."

'What is wrong with brother Sebastian?'

"Marriage and water, I find, don't mix."

"I realize your prescription bottle says 'Keep Tightly Closed', but you still need to take the medication!"

Magic Mushrooms

Bug Funerals

'Business's sure a lot better since we started adding your Dad's stuff.'

'Wait! Let me clip my nails first.'

'Don't worry about the side effects. You already suffer from all the side effects caused by this medication.'

'Of course I'll need to run some tests; but offhand I'd say it's some sort of fungus infection.'

'He specializes in funny bones.'

'You look like a fun guy!'

"It's a great honour to meet you, your majesty. I'm your biggest fan."

'I'm into natural foods, Joe -- give me a martini with a soybean in it.'

Beer...Better living through zymurgy.

'Hold it a minute, Ace.'