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Things that bands can do

'Ok, Flight of the Bumblebee ... once more with feeling'

'I've written a love song about big dividend - playing stocks.'

"There's nothing like a dame!"

Valkyrie.

'. . .But Miss - I'm left-handed!'

Boarway Show

'Mamma Mia, Les Mis, Leveson inquiry...'

The Despair of a Mother Teaching Music to her First Born

The Pirates of Penzance

"I appreciate you have a real passion for music Mr Hibberd. . . but I can see you're going to struggle with the piano."

Claude Debussy

Feeling a little over confident in his abilities, Andrew Lloyd Webber makes a career ending sequel.

'I can't hear a word with all that background music.' 'It's because it's a ballet.'

Arturo Toscanini.

"So that's another show tune that sounds great on the accordion."

Sir Roderick Murgatroyd

I didn't know it was a sponsored production.

Ethelbert Nevin

HMS Pinafore

Cats on stage with a litter box.

'Theaters from Hell.' 'We have no sound engineers, so no there's not a good seat in the house.'

Can can dancer.

Overshadowed by the Tony's: Broadway's Lesser Known Awards

'Midway through the show, a seamless switch, from air guitar to Celtic air fiddle'

Landlord makes a song and dance about the rent at a theatre

'Feeeeeeeeed me, Seymooooooooor.'

Whales being separated from their pod and their iPod.

Veterinary College "I see that drama group's doing 'Cats' again!"

'And how often have you been to see Die Fledemaus?'

'Music hath charms,' &c.

Upper West Side Story

"'Incest: The Musical!' I love it!"