Mummy Aficionado Pillows

'Keep the wrapping.You can't return it without the original packaging.'

'We met at an archaeological dig, in Egypt.'

Werewolf meets the Mummy.

Gone to Lunch.

Egyptian Extra Long-Life Gauze Bandage

2 mummies...

The Real Mummy's Curse

'He really wanted to get into the zombie role, so he became a Meth-Head actor.'

"I've come across a rather disturbing find, Carstairs!"

"What the...They wrapped me in toilet paper!"

Tourists in Egypt

A child at a museum starts to pull the wrappings off a mummy.

An ancient Egyptian exhibit at a museum.

"I'd like to buy a BOWEL."

"OK, we may not have ways of making you talk, but we do have ways of making your leg twitch uncontrollably."

"I don't care if it's more bouncy - it threatens the integrity of the game."

'Hey, what am I, chopped liver?'

"In closing, I would like to remind the jury that he says he didn't do it."

Halloween Selfie

"Stanley, this is a historic moment. We've discovered the world's longest kiss. Guinness Book of Records here we come!"

'Ugh, I hate food with preservatives.'

There's a Facebook group for everyone... "Even Toilet Paper Mummies!"

ESP pizza: You'll get it before you order it or it's free!

Gypsy curses didn't seem so threatening after the Mummy went into the peg business.

"You know I hate birthdays!"

'I told you that 2 month old balonie was cursed!'

Archeologists discover Egyptian Computers.

The Day When The Curse Of The Mummy Lost It's Horror. . .

'Do you know what's worse than being a mummy? Being a mummy with prostate!'

"Call yourself a fortune teller? I've never even heard of the Cairo museum!"

'Amazing, Holmes! That's the eighth time in a row you've gotten the 'dud'!'

"Mummy!

Mummy Musician

"You never know what will catch on!"

"Unwrapping a mummy."