Moving Into Apartment Gifts

'My favorite kitchen tool will always be the old fashioned fork moving automatically to my mouth!'

Domestic Superheroes!!

"Boil, toil and trouble, I wish I'd never started this risotto."

"You haven't got dyslexia- the instructions are in polish."

'Maybe we should have gone for a pommel horse.'

"The kids love it, and it's saved my marriage."

'I couldn't stand the heat, so I got out of the kitchen.'

"In my house, 'dirty dancing' means it's time to mop the floor."

'Make sure you pretend to water it.'

'The plumber said he can't come right now, but promised to put us on his 'wading list'. Cute, huh?'

Painting by the numbers for adults

Maybe I should have measured my garden before going shopping....

"I finally found a use for that old home repair book..."

"The woman on the fire escape who acted like it was a balcony"

'Good news. I found where the termites have been living.'

It's a male thing - I saw a toaster with power assist, and I bought it.

'How many studio apartment construction projects did you say you'd worked on before?'

"I can't wait for vacation - I'm going to go sun myself in a south-facing window."

"I'm thinking of turning this home office into a man-cubicle."

Painting the Ceiling

Tool Box

"You don't think it's too ungapatchka?"

"Man's best friends."

'Homepage Sweet Homepage'

'Esther, is it possible, just possible mind you, that your green thumb has gone berserk?'

"Something went wrong after you inserted tab A into slot B."

Schubert's Unfinished Basement

'They make remarkably clean pets.'

"I sensed you needed my help. I’m Saint &@!#%&!!, the patron saint of cursing."

Housewife feeding her washing machine with a brief.

"Well, yes, it's not what you would call a practical nest, but my wife insisted on using an architect..."

"I believe I have just reached a whole new level of cozy."

'Come on, you can help me to choose some lovely wallpaper.'

A man is living in small box apartment trying to read a book, but is surrounded by people engaging in noisy activities.

'We've knocked out the interior walls to improve our home Wi-Fi coverage.'