Movie Theater Owner Gifts

Now Playing at the Europlex

Movie Rated 'R' - Audience Rates 'X'.

'Say, aren't you the guy who owns the theater I go to? The one with $5 small sodas and $6 popcorn?. . . Well then, you'll understand if my bill for unstopping your sink is $33,000?'

'So you're a lobbyist representing the theatre owners' lobby?'

Books: Novels, Short-Stories, Tall Tales.

'I didn't dedicate my book, A Lifetime of Wine Tasting, to my 3 ex-wives and nine kids, because they made it possible. I did it because they made it necessary.'

Sale on the same stuff as last week.

"Tonight! Author book signing." "Develop your inner raging bitch."

The Dorrie Decimal System

Little dog in Romance section in bookstore under sign: 'Puppy Love'

"Not to be a motion picture - will remain just a book'

Cut Price

'Mysteries' section of bookshop reveals secret door.

'Charlotte's Website' ('The children's book classic rewritten for the electronic era!')

Shop struggles to sell books about recession: '90 per cent off on all credit crunch books' (Titles incluude: Beat the Crunch! Who's to Blame? We're all Doomed!)

'...then Johannes Gutenberg built the first bookcase'

Charles Darwin Book Signing.

'When he comes through that door, let's all jump up and give him a big kiss!'

'It was great. I hated it.'

Author of 'The Big Pop-up Book' popping up out of a folding table.

"Our business is based on breakthroughs."

"International best seller! It's just a squirrel."

"Business is booming! Come in and see our explosive sales today!"

Muhammad Ali publishes a popup book.

'Perhaps Sallie had made her bookshop too comfortable'

Bookstore. The Stock Market for Dummies. It's either an instructional guide or a history of recent economics.

I just reread a great book I downloaded from Amazon about five years ago. You rekindled an old relationship!

'He speaks for our entire generation. Pity he's such a bore...'

Toys were me: lessons learned never growing up

'Don't worry. I'm not charging you for the extra lettering.'

'He wrote a whole book on how to play a slot machine. I'm anxious for his next one: How to Set an Alarm Clock.'

Self Help / Elf Help.

'And I love the part when he finds out that it was his brother all along!'

"Midtown Vinyl. Vintage albums + EPs. Midtown Ink. Vintage books + newspapers."

Man browsing books see couple kissing in romance section of book store.