Motor Mishap Survivor Pillows

'Oh come now-you don't think it will be that easy, do you?'

Road sign: "Good Start, but you've still got a ways to go."

Barbeque Casualty.

"Frank and Sheila finally get off the beaten path."

Welcome Association of Stage Builders.

'After giving a recorded statement to these people, being grilled by 60 Minutes would seem like a piece of cake.'

"Sorry, but there aren't enough life jackets to go around."

"I'll be a bit late... sorry."

Holiday Sales: The Starting Line

"It's a narrative I didn't intend."

Big slipper.

"Coffee...Cigarettes...Bubble gum..."

'This is your lucky day!'

Motorway notices reading: 'Fog. But if you can read this, it isn't that bad'.

In case of stock market crash break glass.

"I got knocked down while jogging in heavy traffic."

'Talking to John always raises my self esteem. He's such a great listener!'

'So, tell me once more how climbing trees is healthier than playing computer games.'

"Stop moaning. I said I'm sorry."

'In defense of rotten movies, they DO have the remarkable ability to make it seem like maybe your life isn't flying by that fast after all!'

"Deputy, round up a posse, I can't find my phone."

'Does that mean no sex tonight?'

'I didn't have a fall. I fell.'

'Little Tommy took the cap off the sauce bottle when he got home from school in the end.'

Desert crawler rescued by truck that won't start.

"You will be pleased to know that the children said sorry!"

'It's lucky for you your legs are O.K.!'

Sling

"I never would've encouraged you to step out of your comfort zone if I'd known you were such a klutz."

"I hope you like sandy beaches, fresh ocean air, and bumper to bumper traffic"

Traffic Jam.

Lost in the shuffle, Bob refused to stop and ask for directions.

'...in conclusion, we're in the wrong meeting room.'

Road Construction Blues.

'What are YOU doing here?'