Motherhood Hero Gifts

"Among them, my children have eighteen years of accumulated experience harassing their mother!"

Gender Equality

"Helen brings home our second, third and fourth incomes."

Striving to reduce our dependence on fossil fuels, scientists attempt to harness the energy of a toddler's tantrum.

Doris K. Elston: Brain Surgeon, Professional Model, Artist, Lawyer....Plus Mother of Four.

It's okay Mom! As a broker, I'm under supervision of the SEC!

Babies vs. Dogs

"I miss the Augean stables."

Mother feeds messy child with extra long spoon.

"I noticed that since I've been working at home you've been paying me hazard pay. How did you know?"

Acclaimed mother.

"You take care of the kids, you do the housework and you have a full-time job for which you warn less than a man who does the same? Respect... I can only fly and knock down scoundrels..."

JAMES BONDING

Today, proud and accomplished the career woman re-enters the dating world, ready at last to meet the man of her dreams. . .

'I'm a work-at-home dad.'

Son, I don't think this was how Whistler painted HIS mother.

"I mean, he does have a point."

"It's different when they're your own."

'Mother will catch you!'

She's good, but Mom's better.

'I'm about to throw a tantrum. What are you doing?'

'My problems seem small to you because you're so darn BIG'

"Being a Mom may be a lot of work but at least you've got job security."

"Ugh. I've been on hold for 20 minutes..."

"So how is being a new mum treating you?"

'What I like most about my mom is that she always supersizes her hugs.'

Breast Feeding in Public

'I don't resent taking orders from a woman... for 20 years I took them from my mother.'

"I want to buy you a card that reflects the sacrifices you've made on my behalf, Mom. Where's your purse?"

"Nothing like taking a few weeks off to spend time with the kids Eh!"

Mom on the First Day of School.

"All we are saying. . . is give peas a chance!"

Working from home.

'The old lady who lived in a shoe had so many Mother's Day cards she didn't know what to do.'

"No woman should have children over 40, that's quite enough for anybody."