Mother-warriors Gifts

Women at war - balancing work & family

"Congratulations, it's a lifetime of penury and countless sleepless nights!"

The Three Wise Queens

Mom, there's a simple explanation for this...Aliens from outer space.

Woman's Support Group: No Bra, No Griddle, No Service.

Well, we thought we had childproofed the house

'Stop pulling that silly face, Dear.'

"But if I don't break stuff who will?"

'If you take this job, you will need child care... that's my second job.'

'Beware of teething baby.'

Buggy with Snowplow.

"Congrats! It's a health future unequally paid sexual harassment victim!"

"No, our company doesn't provide day care or maternity leave."

'Hey, Dad. We learned all about the Kama Sutra at school today... Oh no, not the Kama Sutra, I mean The Magna Carta.'

"Good luck Mr. Bond, you have one minute to diffuse this tantrum."

"That's for staying married for thirty-five years to a difficult woman."

Competitiveness in Ancient Times

Woman feeding baby is covered in food.

"Being a parent is like being in prison. . . except we don't get the hour of exercise."

Pinata good bags.

'I'm about to have a tantrum. What are you doing?'

'It's easy for you to climb the corporate ladder, you just lay your eggs and leave: No need for Maternity Leave!'

'These are very powerful tranquilizers for when your teen has he horrific tantrums. Take two of them anytime she flares up.'

"I changed my mind – no more kids."

"Noah, I'm tired of doing battle with you!"

"He keeps touching me!"

"She cries when I give it to her, she cries when I take it away."

Manspreading in Art

'It seems with every year my hot flashes get worse.'

"Shame about the ovaries..."

'Getting other people's toddler's leftovers on a highchair is one thing, but getting their toddler, too, is another.'

'Every weekend he's off hunting with his buddies! I never see him!!!'

"Now that we're married you'll be cooking and cleaning and ironing and guess who'll be dressing me and combing my hair?" "The mortician."

"This ride is for parents and their kids."

"You're a very intelligent little woman my dear."