Mortgage Adviser Gifts

"I think the new affordability guidelines don't go quite far enough."

'Sorry, no, but thanks for bringing a little laughter into my life.'

'That might well have made you feel better, Mr. Jones, but we still have to negotiate a figure. . .'

"I’ve combined all your outstanding debt into what we here in the banking business like to call a honkin’ big loan."

At first I thought it was just coincidence, but then I realized it corresponded directly to your shift.

The Tightrope Balancing Act of Home Ownership and Interest Rates.

'For an explanation of the financial terms of this loan, please enroll in a continuing-education economics class at your local community college.'

First National Bank. Keep life exciting --- Ask about our variable rate, interest-only mortgages.

Peter

Standard & Poor

Vinnie's Repossessions: A Turtle has just had his shell repossessed

Three little pigs-mortgage.

"This is Mr. Harrington, our mortgage nerd."

Reverse Mortgage.

Canine Comedians

"Since you had so much fun with the Home Equity Loan I gave you, this year's stocking will be filled with a shiny new Notice of Foreclosure."

"Of course you're feeling tired - you're in your sub-prime."

'The hard hats? In case of falling interest rates.'

'The hard hats? In case of falling interest rates.'

' Oh no! I'm being repossessed! '

"Don't knock Florida! Where else can a 73-year old man get a 35-year mortgage?"

'Honey, I'm home.'

An exaggeration of estate agents

God bless our home equity line of credit.

Hell, "I think there's been some sort of mistake, I still owe my soul to the mortgage company"

'This Libor rate scandal gives new meaning to the term 'Fixed'-rate mortgage.'

Home Foreclosed Home.

"I'm gonna ride it out!"

'Good grief! Our house is so 'smart' it just refinanced itself!'

Stan believes in calling a spade a spade.

'This is close enough.'

"Let us pray for the possessed...and the re-possessed"

"Lenders are a lot more cautious about 'interest free' mortgages these days. "

Repossessions

'A great location and only one step from the beach.'